If you think that you have just one life, think again. There's the life you think you have, the life others think you have and the life you really have- three lives!

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Three Lives

I have a theory. Actually I have many theories- but just one will do for now.
My theory is that everyone has at least two identities-
The one you give to yourself- I am an Australian Muslim who advocates for a progressive interpretation of the Koran and Islamic teachings.
And the one everyone else gives you- I am a Muslim and therefore a terrorist sympathiser who wants to wipe out the heathens.

I walk into a coffee shop downtown to get my 'must have or I will be a bitch all day' morning coffee. I'm dressed in my usual corporate uniform- pencil skirt and blouse. It's packed as usual only because they make the best bloody coffee on this earth! The girl behind the counter and I start chatting- it's usually a guy there who always tries some lame pick up line on me, but today he's graduated to making the coffees.
She says "You look so exotic. Where are you from?"
I say "Sydney", but she's not buying it- she wants to know where I'm REALLY from.
So I tell her I'm originally from Egypt.
Lame pick-up line guy overhears this and looks up from behind the coffe machine.
He asks "Are you Muslim?'
"Yep" I answer
Suddenly he starts seething "So what do you think of terrorism?"
I'm thinking 'whoa! what happened to lame pick up line guy? are you his evil twin or something?'
Instead I say "Well are you asking me because you really want to know- because I've been coming here every morning for 6 months and you've never asked me that? But I will tell you that I absolutely do not condone the murder of innocent people for any cause"
He's still seething and the nice behind the counter girl takes my money but doesn't look at me or say a word.
As I make my way out of the crowded cafe, he yells:
"Look out everyone. She's a Muslim terrorist. She's gonna blow up the cafe."
Everyone stops and stares.

So, what do I do?
a. Cry into my coffee cup
b. Play along and make a loud BOOM sound
c. Turn to him and say "Right mate, you've just blown your chance of ever getting my number"
d. Walk out silently seething and vow to go through the painful process of wheening myself off this fabulous coffee so that I never have to step foot in there again.


Faisal said...

You should do:


With a comeback like that, most people will just ignore the fool.

Besides, they wouldn't expect Muslims Terrorists to do that.

The Usual Suspect said...

Good point Faisal
But alas! I am a wussy wussy. Instead I did a silent protest and added them to my long list of People and Organisations I am Boycotting.
So- it you're ever in Perth- stay away from Rossos Cafe on the Terrace- they are evil, evil I tells ya!