If you think that you have just one life, think again. There's the life you think you have, the life others think you have and the life you really have- three lives!

Thursday, August 09, 2007

I did it and I'm back and I'm sorry

So so so so so sorry to everyone who was worried about me.
The good news is I'm fine.
Thanks Peter, Kinzy, Racooooon and everyone else.

The better news is that I've just hit save on the final chapter of my PhD.
Yes yes, I know that I said I wasn't going to do it anymore in my last post- but I just couldn't help myself. I've finished 10 months ahead of schedule- just because I can. I haven't cleaned my oven for a couple of weeks though!

It's been two years, one month and five days since I started my PhD on the fear of terrorism. 10 Focus groups and 60 interviews and 140 000 words and 360 pages later I'm done! In the meantime I seem to have developed an unsightly haunch in my shoulders, a permanent frown and a somewhat nasty disposition (as opposed to my usual sun shiny shiny happy happy disposition).

OK- so let's get up to date.
Marraige- working- YAY. After some really long talks and some laying down of the laws things are working out OK. I basically told himbo that I did not want great sex and physical attraction to be my 'everything'. Sounds lame hey! And I just know that you blokes out there are now shaking your heads furiously and mouthing 'oh noooooooooooooo' while desperately hitting the exit button before your partners see this post and start getting ideas!
But it's true. Everyone I've ever spoken to about marraige problems seems to have the same problem- bad sex. They enjoy a great spiritual and intellectual connection, they describe their partners as their 'best friend' but say they would like more sex. True, that everyone I've ever spoken to about marraige problems happens to be male- but that's beside the point. I have the exact opposite problem- great sex but no intellectual connection. So here's what I did...
I demanded less sex and more connection! I put a limit on all sexual activity and reduced the frequency from 5-7 times a week to 3-4 times a week AND (here's the best bit) I made a new rule that we have to talk about our feelings more. That bit hasn't really worked mainly because I'm not really into talking about feelings unless I'm feeling particularly PMSful. The late late nights working on my thesis have assisted with the sex reduction strategy though.
I hate sounding like a sappy chick flick so I'm going to stop there.

What's next? Oh, I've been very busy writing- not just my thesis- I've been asked to contribute chapters to two books- academic stuff- not the creative kind. I have also been researching a book of my own which I hope to churn out one day (once I get my posture and my sun shiny shiny back). It will be about the discourse of jihad and the ontogenetic power of the jihadi message.

On the political front- Hilaly is out and some other old fart is in his place. I hear this guy is better- the less I hear from him the better I'll think he is! Apart from that am loving watching our PM John Howard squirm in the knowledge that nobody loves him everybody hates him, he should go eat worms! Am hoping that the election will be called soon so that we can all vote him out of office. Not that puppet head, Kevin Rudd, is any better. Anybody else think he looks like a Chucky doll? Maybe it's just me and that nasty disposition of mine.

On the subject of elections- the big big news is that I was approached by a political party (which I can't reveal here because it would blow my cover) to run for a Senate Seat in this years elections. It's really not a big deal as it is highly unlikely that I'll get a seat given that I'm third on the Senate ticket but it is nice to be asked and I really wanted to do it just to let all the Muslim girls out there know that you don't have to hide behind a burqa- you can leave the shadows and it's ok if you do.

And that's about it- boring I know- but most of my time has been spent cultivating a love affair with my laptop (I know which buttons to push to turn it on).
Love to all


Sam said...

glad to see u back and that everything is ok with u...way to go on not giving up on phd and marriage

EgyPeter said...

Jeeeeez Suspect, I thought you were maybe abducted and transported to Saudi Arabia where you were forced to join a harem or something....

Well, thank God you're doing fine :) And it sounds like you're actually doing better than fine! You're quite the bad ass Mrs. Suspect!! And about this whole Senate thing, you should go to Egypt and join the Parliament over there. Maybe you could bring a little sanity to our home country, eh.

Your subtle humor and candid writing always put a smile on my face. Wish you the best and take care TUS!

The Raccoon said...


I was semi-hoping you're somewhere in Brazil, getting wasted and dancing with cute guys... ;)

But this is almost as good!

Congrats on the PhD, the marriage and the Senate offering!

Now Raccoonish botherings, yes? :)

Sex - it's not a question of quantity, I reckon, but of quality. One divine intercourse a week is enough for me (but only if it's divine). And I am a male, albeit of a different species.

What's wrong with Howard, save for him being a politician? Aussieland doesn't seem to be doing too bad with him at the helm.

Book - you MUST write literature! Not academic stuff, literature. You have a talent, a lot to say and you know how to say it. Learning about Jihad is important... but teaching about life is more important.

Do you reckon you're ready to enter the lair of the Wyrm and be a Senator? It sounds like quite the ordeal, especially for someone as active as you.

Great to have you back! :)

nominally challenged said...

I have just one word to say about this post:


You are an inspiration :)

kinzi said...

YAY ,TUS!!! I said "Wahoo" out loud, and my kids said "What?" and I said "TUS IS BACK". They thought I meant the Arabic word "tuuzz".

"Tuuuzz" on the old problems and bravo on the new blessings.

GREAT news on the home front, and ya did good!! Limits and LONGING at times make for better sex!!

My prayers for you have been answered. I even prayed for a position of leadership for you, how's that for 'in tune'!!

Roman Kalik said...

Welcome back, TUS, and it's about bloody time! ;-)

Will E. said...

Great to have you back.. very clever including the interesting talk about sex along with your PhD.. cunning :)

In any case, hope to hear more from you soon.

HalalHippie said...

yaaay! TUS is back! I was getting worried too.

and Raccoon: "Sex - it's not a question of quantity, I reckon, but of quality. One divine intercourse a week is enough for me (but only if it's divine). And I am a male, albeit from a different galaxy."

Glad I'm not alone on this :-)

Highlander said...

Congrats and welcome back !
Also Eid Marbouk to you and yours

Howie said...

It is for these very reasons I wish I would have married a man.

Howie said...

Conversation between Howie and wife:

H: Let's have sex

W: Sure...but don't wake me up again

H: Do we have to talk about feelings?

W: Sure...I wish you would hurry and finish so you will sleep and leave me alone

H: Can we have a threesome?

W: You sure you want to talk about feelings to TWO women?

H: You have a point...not worth it

W: Damn right

H: Raccoon says we should have "divine" sex once a week.

W: So you going back to masturbation?

H: What do you mean..."back to"???

Glad to see you back girl though I am 4 months late

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HalalHippie said...

Adam Brown, begone, you vile spammer! and TUS, pleeease come back. You have a crowd of male fans, who miss you.

مفقود said...

three lives you say ...
what is the third one? and if it is the one you really have then .. why?

BamBina said...

I just happenned to stumble over this post after googling "egyptian girls marrying non muslim men" and I am absolutely stunned by your most accurate description of egyptian peoples' attitudes and the sacrifices egyptian girls and their non egyptian husbands have to make. I wish we could dicuss this, I am an egyptian girl who lives in Canada and who has decided to get married to my non egytpain non arab boyfriend of 2.5 years. I have so many questions that have no answers, and don't know anyone who is in the same situation.

Will E. said...

i'd have thought you'd be back..

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Habeebti, WAYNIK?

someone visited my blog from here, and reminded me of another blogging season with your wit and wisdom.

come back again!

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